Saturday, October 24, 2009

The Mermaid Lives!

Yes, it's true, the mermaid has gone on walkabout.

I'm freezing my tail off in South Carolina in the USA! Brrrrrrrrrr...

They say around me, "Oh, this is unusual weather for this time of year!"

Is that supposed to warm me up any?

So now I am wearing long sleeve shirts and long leggings under my Caribbean mermaid dresses. I've developed a whole new fashion style that amuses the locals. So many layers of clothes! Good heavens.

AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES (That Really Work!)

1. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU SLICE.

2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY USING THE SINK.

3. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER.

4.. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.

5. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.

6. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.

7. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Get Out: Orionid Meteor Shower Peaks Overnight

Get Out: Orionid Meteor Shower Peaks Overnight

posted: 20 October 2009
12:13 pm ET

The Orionid meteor shower is expected to put on a good show tonight into the predawn hours Wednesday, weather permitting.

This annual meteor shower is created when Earth passes through trails of comet debris left in space long ago by Halley's Comet. The "shooting stars" develop when bits typically no larger than a pea , and mostly sand-grain-sized, vaporize in Earth's upper atmosphere.

"Flakes of comet dust hitting the atmosphere should give us dozens of meteors per hour," said Bill Cooke of NASA's Meteoroid Environment Office.

People in cities and suburbs will see far fewer meteors, because all but the brightest of them will be overpowered by light pollution. The best view will be from rural areas (the moon will not be a factor, so dark skies will make for ideal viewing).

When and how to watch

The best time to watch will be between 1 a.m. and dawn local time Wednesday morning, regardless of your location. That's when the patch of Earth you are standing on is barreling headlong into space on Earth's orbital track, and meteors get scooped up like bugs on a windshield.

Peak activity, when Earth wades into the densest part of the debris, is expected around 6 a.m. ET (3 a.m. PT).

Some meteors could show up late tonight, too. Late-night viewing typically offers fewer meteors, however, because your patch of Earth is positioned akin to the back window of the speeding car.

The Orionids have been strong in recent years.

"Since 2006, the Orionids have been one of the best showers of the year, with counts of 60 or more meteors per hour," Cooke said.

Some of those counts come in flurries, so skywatchers should find a comfortable spot with as wide a view of the sky as possible. Lie back and allow 15 minutes for your eyes to adjust to the darkness, then give the show at least a half hour to play out through spurts and lulls. Meteors could appear anywhere in the sky, though traced back they will appear to emanate from the constellation Orion.

Telescopes and binoculars are of no use, because meteors move too quickly. Extra warm clothing is a must, and a blanket and pillow or lounge chair allows comfortable positioning so you can look up for long stretches.

Reliable event

Predicting meteor showers is tricky because the debris comes from multiple streams.

Each time comet Halley passes around the sun on its elongated orbit – every 76 years – it lays down a fresh track of debris for Earth to plow through in subsequent years. Those tracks spread out and mingle over time, and we pass the tracks each October during our 365-day, nearly circular trek around the sun.

Japanese researchers Mikiya Sato and Jun-ichi Watanabe say activity in recent years is related to debris put in place from 1266 BC to 911 BC, and this could be another good year, according to NASA.

Even if that prediction does not hold, the Orionids will almost surely put on a decent show. Prior to 2006 and going back many years, the Orionids have produced a reliable 15 to 20 meteors per hour at the peak, for skywatchers with dark skies.

As a bonus, this time of year you can expect an additional five to 10 sporadic meteors per hour – those not related to the shower.

Jokes for all

First the husband jokes...

My husband sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels. He asked, "What's on TV?"

I said, "Dust."
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My husband was hinting about what he wanted for our upcoming anniversary.
He said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds."

So I bought him a nice new shiny bathroom scale.
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When I got home last night, my husband demanded that I take him someplace expensive...

so, I took him to a gas station...
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Now the wife jokes...


After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.

The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me and she processed my Social Security application.

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.
She said, 'you should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too.'
===============================================================
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.
My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.'
'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'
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And the un-politically correct joke...
I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn't believe it... he was a DWARF!!!

He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT HAPPY!'

So, I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?'
============================================================

Friday, October 16, 2009

GROWING ART WITH COMPUTERS...

GROWING ART WITH COMPUTERS...


Computers were used to precisely plot planting of the four differently
colored rice varieties that bring these images to life in Japan's rice
paddies.

Rice Paddies grown ito artwork in Japan
Rice Paddies grown ito artwork in Japan
Rice Paddies grown ito artwork in Japan
Rice Paddies grown ito artwork in Japan
Rice Paddies grown ito artwork in Japan
Rice Paddies grown ito artwork in Japan


Sunday, October 11, 2009

Tragedy

Sometimes tragedy strikes when you least expect it. Have you ever had your heart ripped right out of your soul?

I am very sad and have taken a break from writing. Just a short one.

I've also not been on the phone much at all and declining calls, letting voice mail take the messages. I am just very sad and looking for my mojo, trying to find my groove again.

I will find my voice and pen soon.

I hope.

Angels are on the way.

Monday, September 28, 2009

A Snowstorm in the Caribbean?



Incredible Sunset over Sopers Hole, West End, Tortola British Virgin Islands (By the way, the power lines in the pic look like they have snagged a boat in the harbor, it's an illusion and a reminder we need underground utilities here!)

That anvil cloud on the right looms like a MEGA cruise ship darkening the horizon! Indeed, is it a shadow of a cruise ship passing by the sun? But the lines seem uncertain.

What is even stranger is that anvil clouds which are mostly ice, form in the upper parts of thunderstorms. They get their anvil shape from the fact that the rising air in thunderstorms expands and spreads out as the air bumps up against the bottom of the stratosphere. You will often see streaks of snow falling out of the edges of anvils. This light snow usually evaporates as it falls through the relatively dry air surrounding the upper part of the thunderstorm.

A SNOWSTORM IN THE CARIBBEAN? The central portions of anvil clouds often contain heavy snow, which melts as it falls into warmer air below, turning to rain. About 50% of the rain produced by the average thunderstorm originates in this way.

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SOLD 2 books yesterday, so that leaves only 7,140 until my medical bills are paid off! *giggle*


Visit my book "Hurricanes and Hangovers" and purchase copies for yourself and gifts for your friends (one size fits all) at http://DearMissMermaid.Com/where.html this includes a link to Amazon, which will ship worldwide as well as deliver your gifts for you.

Right now, if you hurry, you can mail order NEW copies from Captains Lady at the unheard of bargain rate of only $12.00 (Hurry before she runs out!)


Sunday, September 27, 2009

Incredible Colors during Sunset


WOW!


Dear Miss Mermaid
What makes this such a unique picture, is that it was taken during sunset while looking southeast, rather than westward. On the horizon, left to right is Fallen Jerusalem, Broken, Jerusalem, Round Rock, Ginger Island and Cooper Island. A lone sailboat lazily drifts down the Sir Francis Drake Channel. To the left is Buck Island, which is up for sale for a rumored 30 million, which includes the dock and home on 43 acres.

I tried to verify this, but Internet ads simply say "price on application." Not sure what all the secrecy is about, maybe they want to check your financial background first and make a few side deals, in view of the BVI stamp tax that must be paid at the time of purchase.

On transfer of title, a property Stamp Duty at the rate of 12% of the appraised value or purchase price (whichever is higher) is payable to the BVI by the purchaser. Better have a few spare million laying around. Then don't forget about the staffing of the place, surely if you can afford that, you aren't going to be sweeping up nor making your Lobster and Caviar Frittatta on your own.

Back to reality...

I need to sell 7,142 more books to pay off my recent medical bills. YIKES!

Visit my book "Hurricanes and Hangovers" and purchase copies for yourself and gifts for your friends (one size fits all) at http://DearMissMermaid.Com/where.html this includes a link to Amazon, which will ship worldwide as well as deliver your gifts for you.

Right now, if you hurry, you can mail order NEW copies from CaptainsLady at the unheard of bargain rate of only $12.00 (Hurry before she runs out!)

Hurricanes and Hangovers (and other tall tales and loose lies from the coconut telegraph) by Dear Miss Mermaid


Saturday, September 26, 2009

Stay Tuned!

This blog will continue with more fun and mayhem. I've had a really rough week medically. I also had to go to court. My evil landlord's agent is a greedy witch and wanted to raise my rent or evict me.

Well, the judge threw the mess out and asked if I wanted to countersue for all the heaps of harassment she and her employees have inflicted on me the past few months. They even harassed me by phone in the hospital!

Most landlord's MIGHT have checked to see if I was all right or maybe in view of my ridiculously high rent, even sent flowers! But Noooooooo... they called me several days for pure harassment and acted deaf each time I told them "I am in the hospital! I mailed your rent check, now PLEASE let me rest!"

She wanted me to cancel the check, get cash and bring it to her! My doctor didn't want to wheel me down to the bank to do this madness. Imagine that...

More later on the evil witch...