Thursday, May 30, 2013

Not Guilty By Reason of Temporary Insanity

I am so confused.

This happened to me awhile back. I accidentally recorded this phone conversation. I guess I spazzed out when dialing out on the computer phone and hit the wrong button.

I found a mysterious file recently.  What the heck is this?

Turns out it was a recording.  It gave me such a laugh, I thought you might enjoy it.

This conversation is with someone I've known an awfully long time. I've known them for decades.

This person is not senile by any means. But they have a certain problem that I have delicately mentioned to them before.  They told me I was dead wrong, so I dropped the matter.

This conversation might prove me *ahem* right.

Amazing!  Me right?  About anything?

I am so used to being wrong about everything.

The problem?

My dear friend just can not answer a question.

Read through our transcribed phone conversation below.  See what you think.

Inquiring minds want to know...

I've put their part of the conversation in italics and mine in regular print.

After they answered I started off with: "Good morning!  How are you doing?"

"The cat is hungry."

"Oh, so you need to go feed the cat?  Do you want to call me back later when you can talk?"

"I'm looking for my hair brush."

"Oh I see you are busy. I'll make this quick, I was just calling to see if you would like to come to lunch this Sunday."

"I have an eye appointment tomorrow."

"OK, let's see, tomorrow is Wednesday. Are you getting new eyeglasses?"

"I need to buy some bluejeans, these are too long."

"Have you thought about getting them hemmed up?"

"Jeopardy comes on TV in ten minutes."

"Oh I see. OK, I better get off the phone. Well before I go, what about coming over for lunch on Sunday?  Would you like to do that? The weather is perfect this time of year, we could dine on the patio with a view of the lake.  I'd love to visit with you. Are you available?"

"The mailman just came."

"OK, I guess you need to go get the mail. But before I go, what about Sunday?  Do you want to come to lunch?"

"I need to write some checks."

"Oh well, that's always fun, sitting down to pay bills.  Well, I thought I would shop on Saturday. I know you love lasagna. I was thinking of making that on Sunday. Would you like to come to lunch?

"How much does it cost to hem bluejeans?"

"Um, I don't know. I've never had that done. You could just buy fabric glue and do it yourself since you don't sew."

"I can't find my envelopes."

"Well, if you're coming down for Sunday lunch, I can give you a stack of envelopes. Would that help?"

"Do you think it would be over ten dollars to hem my jeans?"

"Um, well, I just don't know. But I think I did see an "Alterations" sign near your house on the highway. Maybe you could stop by there and ask them.  It might help if you took the bluejeans with you so they could see them and pin them up."

"The mailman has driven by twice now, and both times skipped my mailbox."

"Perhaps you didn't have any mail today."

"I lost my umbrella. I think I left it at a restaurant. It was raining when I got there, but was dry when I left."

"Oh what a shame. Maybe they are holding it for you. Have you tried calling them or going by there?"

"I need to take a shower."

"Alright, well I've got things to do too. Um, what do you think about Sunday?  Can you make it for lunch?"

"The cat wants out."

"Alright, well, bye now. It was nice talking to you!"

"OK, bye."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was a tad miffed. Good grief. You try to do something nice for somebody and they can't  be bothered with a simple yes or no or even mumbling I will think about it and let you know. Oddly enough, we didn't even speak on the phone the rest of the week.

So Saturday rolls around. I didn't go shopping. Why make lasagna for me alone?  I love leftovers, but why bother. I am still recuperating. I tire out easily.  No one is coming to lunch anyhow.

Sunday appears.  By mid day I am feeling kind of weak.  I figure maybe a nap will cure that. But first I slapped together a sandwich to eat for lunch. Then the puppy dog and I laid down for a nap.

In the midst of my pleasant dreams, I realize the dog is barking, someone is banging at the door and my phone is ringing. I struggle out of bed very confused.

The dog is barking wildly, I decide to forget the phone in order to check the door.

There stands my friend. I can see them through the window holding their phone. I open the door.

"Hi!  I was just calling you on your phone. When's lunch?  I'm starving.  Can't wait to try the lasagna."

I stared at my friend while my imagination ran wild. I wanted to commit the unthinkable crime.

Instead, I gritted my teeth, while silently counting to ninety-nine until the urge passed.

But can you imagine?

The what if?

The aftermath... the trial...

"Your Honorable Judge, I plead not guilty by reason of temporary insanity!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Canine Cut-up

Did you hear about the doggy who gave birth to nine puppies on the side of the busy highway?





Well some good Samaritan called nine one one to report it. 


The authorities came out to investigate.



They gave her a ticket for littering. 


Sunday, May 26, 2013

Cut The Costs of Travel

It's Memorial Day weekend. I am happy and busy with my volunteering.

Harley dog is similarly occupied woofcamping as a bark ranger.

After years of working in the hospitality industry nights, weekends and holidays, volunteering the same erratic schedule seems pretty much the norm for me.

But it sure is fun to have a puppy dog as a coworker.



D for depart.

The D on the gear shift of my wheel estate stands for Depart.

My feet are itchy, I've been camping here for a month or more. There is a restless wanderlust in me that I can't seem to control.

I wistfully dream about roaming around this beautiful world.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If your budget is in need of some traveling help, consider these options:


Save 10-15 cents per gallon on gas at certain Walmarts through  July 7, 2013
Save 10-15 cents per gallon on gas at certain Walmarts through  July 7, 2013
For details see:
http://www.walmart.com/cp/Rollbacks-On-Gas/1087144

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Earn free nights at Georgia State Parks

Earn free nights at Georgia State Parks

Sign up today and we will send you a passport to help you start earning a free 10th night in a Georgia State Park. Your welcome kit will also contain a free club keychain and decal for your RV. It's our way of saying thank you for your loyalty.
For details see:
http://www.gastateparks.org/RVClub

Don't have an RV?  Camp in a tent in Georgia State Parks and earn free nights too.
Camp for 9 nights in a Georgia State Park campground and get the 10th night FREE.  Upon check-in or check-out, receive 1 sticker for each night you pay to camp in a Georgia State Park. Collect 9 stickers to earn one FREE campsite.
For details see:
http://www.gastateparks.org/geo-camp

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Print out Dollar General's $5 coupon to use on  June 1st. Spend $30, get $5 off. They sell food, camping supplies, and general household items. 


For details and coupon printing see:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If you know of any great wallet stretchers for travelers, campers and RVers, let me know.
This isn't a clickable link, because the spam bots will snatch it. If you're human just retype the address into your email program. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Like this blog?
It costs you nothing extra but Dear Miss Mermaid earns a small commission.

Saturday, May 25, 2013

Dreadful Blathering Idiot

This blog, pictures, and all my other writing is coming to a screeching halt as of today. That is IF I can get online and if I can get this posted.  


If you see me drooling, bald, eyes glazed over and stark raving mad, you will know it's ME. The DBI, the dreadful blathering idiot by dear miss mermaid
"YOU NEED PERMISSION TO PERFORM THIS ACTION."



If you see me drooling, bald, eyes glazed over and stark raving mad, you will know it's ME. The DBI, the dreadful blathering idiot. 

You can blame Windows 7 for reducing me to tearing my hair out, screaming obscenities and completely losing my mind.

"YOU NEED PERMISSION TO PERFORM THIS ACTION."

My old  laptop that was running Windows XP just as smoothly as can be, just inexplicably died one morning.  I was a very happy camper. Then poof, can't get it started, can't get it fixed. I so want it running again, life was GOOD. My backups were a tad old (I was traveling and uploading all my pics too!) and the old XP is holding a few weeks of pictures, personal messes and volumes of writing hostage.

Usually I am pretty diligent to backup by copy and pasting to my external hard drive. But I wasn't feeling well, I was trying to travel up to my workamping site, the poop tank fell off, the gas tank tried to blow up and well there were more things to do than time in the day and I foolishly let the backups take a back seat. Shame on me.

"YOU NEED PERMISSION TO PERFORM THIS ACTION."

Then a super wonderful angel brought me a Windows 7 laptop to use. I am oh so  grateful, because I was tackling a huge project, namely sorting out my pictures and files for the numerous books and articles I am working on now that I am feeling so much better. Still I am miffed about the weeks of traveling pictures and work I am missing.

And it's ALL my fault too.

I figured I am not senile yet, I just ACT like I am apparently.

I just foolishly thought  I can force myself to learn Windows 7.  Don't want to, but I think I can.

"YOU NEED PERMISSION TO PERFORM THIS ACTION."

I seem to be in a holding pattern health wise, not any worse, and maybe much better. Yippie doodle do!  Life is good! I am in a big dang hurry to get loads of things done while I have this miraculous energy!

But...

"YOU NEED PERMISSION TO PERFORM THIS ACTION."

I am now drooling, eyes glazed over, hair severely thinned and still Windows 7 is TAUNTING ME like a mean nasty playground bully that just wants to take my happiness and stomp all over it until it and I are completely obliterated once and for all.

"YOU NEED PERMISSION TO PERFORM THIS ACTION."

I am the only one using this computer and the only one trying to access my external and internal hard drives. I have gone online and read numerous articles on how to fix it and tried to follow everything they tell me, and  STILL I am such an idiot, such a fool, I cannot seem to do whatever it is that Windows 7 mysteriously wants me to do to gain full ownership over all my hard drives both inside and outside the laptop.

"YOU NEED PERMISSION TO PERFORM THIS ACTION."

Windows 7 is nothing but a great big bully beating me up, knocking me out, rattling my brain, ruining my day and making my life pure torture.

All my files are stuck on an external hard drive and Windows 7 just won't let me LIVE IN PEACE and do my thing.

"YOU NEED PERMISSION TO PERFORM THIS ACTION."

So that's it!  Goodbye cruel computer world!  Goodbye pictures, goodbye writing, goodbye  technology.



"YOU NEED PERMISSION TO PERFORM THIS ACTION."


Thursday, May 23, 2013

Good Clean Fun

Today I am having an attack of the giggles.  I surely need some comedic relief. At the height of last night's storm I was scurrying around my mini motorhome for a change in undies and attaching a note tag to my big toe.

Just in case.

These are products, ads and comments I've accidentally stumbled upon on Amazon. I've included the current links in case you want to see for yourself.  I didn't make these pictures up, just funny clips I threw in a file whenever I came across something that titillated my warped sense of humor.

It started when I read a hilarious review about Orcon LB-C1500 Live Ladybugs, Approximately 1,500 Count

Orcon LB-C1500 Live Ladybugs, Approximately 1,500 Count by Dear Miss Mermaid

I think the Ladybug man is testing out his sit-down comedy  on the Amazon review platform. This is probably why they've added a computer installed "Amazon Verified Purchase" to the reviews that qualify (notice his doesn't have this badge included.)

Only 4 of 13 people found his review helpful. Even funnier!  Keep your day job dude...

OK, let's go green.

Save mother earth!  Stop executing all those trees for the endless printing many do now that computers enable anyone to print anything and miles of it too.

Mr. Ellie Pooh Natural White Elephant Dung Paper (100pc Ream)

At least no elephants were injured in the making of this product.  But the paper is two-fold, we've cleaned up the planet of that pesky elephant dung everyone is always tripping over and we've not chopped down any trees for our ravenous printers.

Mr. Ellie Pooh Natural White Elephant Dung Paper (100pc Ream) by Dear Miss Mermaid



As a bonus, it's great for origami.  When I was a mere child my mother bought me Origami books and  thin colorful exquisite paper for my birthday.  Pretty soon I had the whole house littered with my paper art. (Origami is the art of paper folding without the use of glue or scissors to make paper sculptures.)

I was forced to give up on Origami when I used up all my remaining paper while failing miserably at learning how to fold a grand piano.  I had already accomplished an upright piano, but longed for the paper grand.

Ah those lofty childhood pursuits...

I also loved to play with a beautiful dollhouse my grandfather built. One Christmas Santa Claus brought me miniature furniture for it and another time he delivered tiny dishes.

But for the sophisticated child, you can now buy the
Dollhouse Miniature 3-Pc White Wine Set

Dollhouse Miniature 3-Pc White Wine Set by Dear Miss Mermaid

This struck me as hilarious, because American culture generally abhors child drinking, but Amazon is a multi-national company which might explain why there are only 8 left in stock.

You might want to hurry up and make your purchase because the Dollhouse IRISH WHISKEY and SCHNAPPS is already sold out!

I had no idea this was such a coveted toy or addition for a child's dollhouse. It gives a whole new meaning to happy hour.

Dollhouse IRISH WHISKEY and SCHNAPPS by dear miss mermaid


Speaking of toys... let's move on to some good clean fun!

How did the Design Sense Generic Weener Kleener Soap end up in "Toys and Games"?

Maybe it should be in the adult toys and games... not sure you want your child having this kind of good clean fun while the rest of the family is frantically waiting on their turn in the bathtub.

Looking over the ad carefully, I see there is another ad to "Find the Perfect Gift For Your Kid". Maybe they put that there in case the Weener Kleener Soap wasn't quite the child's toy you were seeking.

Another hilarious aspect is at the bottom of the product display, you are encouraged to "Share your own customer images".

Thankfully no one has shared their customer image, but it sure must be a popular product because 63 people have written reviews about it.

I suppose next time you are shopping for a male that is impossible to buy for, you can always get him this gift. Chances are, he doesn't have one in his toiletry kit.

On another note, it makes a great wedding gift for the budget minded shopper. The product display gives you a choice of buying this item new or used (at a discounted price) but you better hurry because there are only 3 used ones left in stock.

Design Sense Generic Weener Kleener Soap by dear miss mermaid

Dear Miss Mermaid thanks you for stopping by today!

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

60 mph Winds and Big Hail

Storm headed this way with 60 mph winds and big hail.

Lightning, thunder, heavy rains. 

Already did this scene last month in Orlando, it was frightening then too.

I am in Lavonia...

Later folks!

AT 916 PM EDT...NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE DOPPLER RADAR INDICATED A
SEVERE THUNDERSTORM CAPABLE OF PRODUCING QUARTER SIZE HAIL...AND
DAMAGING WINDS IN EXCESS OF 60 MPH.  THIS STORM WAS LOCATED NEAR
LAVONIA...OR 9 MILES NORTHWEST OF HARTWELL. OTHER STRONG STORMS WERE
LOCATED OVER WESTERN FRANKLIN COUNTY. STORMS WERE MOVING EAST AT 15
MPH.

BRIEF DAMAGING WINDS WILL BLOW DOWN TREES AND POWER LINES OVER SMALL
AREAS. A BRIEF PERIOD OF LARGE HAIL IS ALSO POSSIBLE. SEEK SHELTER
INSIDE AN INTERIOR ROOM.

PLEASE REPORT DAMAGING WINDS...HAIL...OR FLOODING TO THE NATIONAL
WEATHER SERVICE GREENVILLE SPARTANBURG BY CALLING TOLL FREE...1...
800...2 6 7...8 1 0 1...OR BY POSTING ON OUR FACEBOOK PAGE...OR TWEET
IT USING HASHTAG NWSGSP. YOUR MESSAGE SHOULD DESCRIBE THE EVENT AND
THE SPECIFIC LOCATION WHERE IT OCCURRED.


Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Mensa Test

I was invited to join Mensa. Next I had to take their test. Recently they mailed me the results.

dear miss mermaid at long point park

Apparently I flunked out by managing to score a complete zero.

Here are some of the questions with my answers.

Incredible to think they think that I think "What were they thinking?"

Q-Explain how to change centimeters to meters.

A-omit centi

Q-Where was the American Declaration of Independence signed?

A-At the bottom.

Q-Name the wife of Orpheus, whom he attempted to save from the underworld.

A-Mrs Orpheus

Q-Briefly explain what hard water is.

A-Ice (Is that brief enough?)

Q-The race of people known as the Malays come from where?

A-Parents

Q-What did Mahatma Ghandi and Genghis Khan have in common?

A-Unusual names.

Q-Name six animals which specifically live in the Arctic.

A-Three polar bears, two seals, one penguin.

Q-What is a fibula?

A-A white lie gone bad

Q-What do we call a person forced to leave their home perhaps by a natural disaster or war, without having another home to go to?

A-Homeless

Q-Name an environmental side effect of burning fossil fuels.

A-Fire

Q-In which battle did Napolean die?

A-His last.

Q-If it took 4 men 10 hours to build a wall, how long would it take 6 men to build the same wall?

A-None (the first 4 already built it)

Q-In which state is the Willamette River?

A-Liquid

Q-Name one life changing invention from the past 100 years.

A-Me!

dreadful tattoo
So go life it up!

Something Dreadful


Something dreadful made me hurt, angry and upset.

People can sometimes be so cruel, whether it was their intention or not, or whether they are just social clods, one just never knows.

But dealing with my anger, hurt feelings and pain need to be addressed.

How I do not know.

I can't seem to concentrate on things I should be doing. Bah humbug.

But I decided on two things.

One, the dog and I need more walking and two, the park and neighborhood where I am camping is perpetually scattered with litter from the public. It's an ongoing nuisance problem.  (Let's go some place beautiful and trash it.)

I believe the land is sacred and we should treat it with tremendous respect. Apparently not many people agree from the looks of what today's loot brought in.

So, I leashed up the puppy on his flexi-leash, attached that to the huge spring clip, then attached a cleaning bucket to the spring clip. In this way, I am able to hold the spring clip which holds the leash and bucket.

In my other hand is the litter picker upper. It's a long stick with mechanical fingers to grasp things.

Yeah, I am lazy, I don't want to bend over a thousand times picking up litter, so I use my grasper.

So every time I get to wallowing in my pain, anger and hurt feelings, I get up and walk the dog while picking up the random litter that thoughtless people have left behind. My arms ache, my legs feel funny. A few times I had to stop in place just to gather up my strength to keep going.

It's only 3:20pm and the dog is exhausted.  We've filled, dumped and refilled our bucket over and over.  Some of the stuff we found included a used roof shingle, a big hunk of glass, two car or boat parts, dozens of cigarette and cigar butts, assorted beer cans, one pencil, soda bottles, a wash cloth, coffee cups, brown paper towels, a $75 parking ticket, straws, a pair of glasses, 2 plumbing parts,  gum wrappers, a gift card, 4 fishing lures, a hair curler, water bottle tops, crumpled tin foil, burger wrappers, a ponytail holder, 1 sneaker, a pair of underwear, 5 paper clips, 3 forks, 2 bolts and 1 big screw.

The park and road sides are looking beautiful again. I am covered in sweat, guzzling down homemade iced tea.

Am I still hurt, angry and upset?

Yes.

Let's be honest, I am!

But it feels good that something positive is getting done in spite of it all.

The dishes are piled up, there are a dozen projects I should have been doing, but picking up litter is mindless work. It jumps out at me, I can see the tiniest wrapper hiding under a bush.

Oh and the wild flowers. It was eye candy to see so many beautiful wild flowers.

Life is strange.

Sunday, May 19, 2013

Paws-itively

Harley dog thanks everyone for all the wonderful get well wishes and  tail swishes. He has a new leash on life after his emergency ear surgery. Boy was he glad to flea the hospital, the staff was ticking him off. It was ruff at first, but he is paws-itively doing quite well.  He enjoyed recuperating while listening to Pooch-ini on his i-pawd. Your get well cards were howl-arious and all the nice mutt-erings made light of his tail of woe.  Just beagle-ad this update is rover. Oh and here is a pawpaw-razzi picture that is less than fetching, of Harley giggling in bed while on pain meds. 


Harley giggling in bed while on pain meds...by dear miss mermaid


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I wish I could run away with the circus!  They have a position open for a couple or single with an RV.  How I wish it were me and my dawg!

http://www.work-for-rvers-and-campers.com/usa-school-teacher-for-carson-and-barnes-circus.html

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Speaking of painting the interior of your RV:



I found this blog, it's in  German, but you can still  look at all the before and after pictures of their RV besides just the few I've posted.  All rather cutesy!

http://home-sweet-motorhome.blogspot.com/2011/07/es-ist-vollbracht-innenrenovierung.html



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am now working on an old new laptop, thanks to a generous angel. Yippie! 

My old offline dictionary that has worked for me since Windows 3.1  (yeah we are talking the dark ages here...)  right up through XP, no longer seems to work now that I am being forced to learn Windows 7. 

YIKES!

I need an offline dictionary and thesaurus for my everyday writing and rambling. Believe me, you only see the tip of the iceberg here for the mountains of notes, chapters, ideas, beginnings and in-progress scribbling. 

So I was dismayed when my trusty old one refused to start up. I  searched for a freebie offline dictionary and thesaurus. I finally found:


WordWeb 6.8 for Windows 2000/XP/Vista/7/8 (desktop)
Free*. No SpyWare. No AdWare. No viruses. Works off-line.

Sounds too good to be true!  But I downloaded it and so far I am super happy!

http://wordweb.info/free/


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~




the end by dear miss mermaid
THE END

Saturday, May 18, 2013

Spring


I was far away when I caught glimpse of this doe.  She stood for her photo, then tossed up her white tail, leaping into the woods. 

After watching some deer run for their life with a coyote on their heals, right outside my RV last fall, I could understand why they say reindeer can fly. To watch deer run for their life, they look like they are indeed flying!

THey were taking these massive leaps into the air, their legs would fold up underneath their belly. They looked to be six to eight feet off the ground.  I expected one to take off into the sky reindeer style any moment. 


I was trying to capture the beauty of spring after all these rains.


Every time I see a fallen feather, I think of the Forrest Gump movie. Throughout the movie, falling feathers appear in various scenes.

My favorite stomping grounds in the South Carolina Lowcountry is where some of the movie was filmed including Beaufort, Hunting Island, Lady's Island, St Helena, Fripp Island and I probably missed a few places.

Bright red mud supports these flowers. Incredible!


Just last fall when I left Lake Hartwell, this bridge and floating dock were both sitting in the mud of the low lake. While it's not at full pond today, it's pretty darn close.


As a child, honeysuckles grew on the playground fence of the school I attended. During the 30 minutes of playtime we were allotted, I remember many of us just standing there sucking the sugary stamen of all the flowers we could reach. If you've never tasted that delicious drop of nectar, then you have truly missed out on one of life's greatest treats.


Harley has a love hate relationship with bridges and water. Sometimes he forgets he has learned how to do this, so I teach him again and again. Other times he happily walks across a bridge without hesitation.


Spring and the frequent rains we've had have brought an abundance of flowers. I so hope the mower doesn't show up anytime soon because he will run them all down.

The old familiar curious markings are still here on various roads.  I've heard that hobos on the road leave secret markings where it's safe or not safe to sleep or camp or where they might find free food or a handout. No idea what this is or what it means.

Thursday, May 16, 2013

Dropsy

Above: Lake Hartwell when it was low on water in June  2012, the floating docks are at the end of their rope, literally. The owners have moved their floating docks repeatedly to try to keep up with the rapidly draining lake.
Below:  Lake Hartwell on May 15, 2013 which is one quarter inch away from being full pond.  In this picture I am standing further to the left, because where I stood to take the 2012 picture is now underwater. The floating docks have been reigned back in closer to the new shore by their owners.

The lake is full this spring!
The torrential rain storms were well worth it.
Can you identify the critter on the left that sneaked into my photo?

This place is a wreck!  I mean my wheel estate, not the lake. 

It was so cold last night, I  was trying to pull the covers up over me, but they were stuck. Then I realized a certain puppy dog was hogging the covers. I accidentally woke him up while I was tugging at the comforter. He stood up, hit his head on a basket hanging on the wall in the bedroom over the bed.

Well, the basket fell off the wall, bounced on the bed, dumped all of its contents on the floor with a loud crash. The puppy and I stared at each other, then went back to sleep.  This time he commandeered the afghan while I hogged the comforter.

An hour or so later, I woke up with serious cotton mouth. I sleepily slid out of bed *OUCH*  stepping on the junk on the floor which included the wall basket, a bottle of pills, some lip balm, a 12 volt light bulb, a bottle of nail polish, a nail file, a reading light, a small empty box, the remote controls, bobby pins, an RV part, a hair tie, two pens, a pad of paper and a scarf. I guess you could say my wall basket is the junk drawer of the bedroom.

Or was.

I was thirsty, so I just kicked the junk with my foot, then headed for the kitchen. Four steps later (small RV)  I was at the refrigerator. I opened up the door, picked up a quart of iced green tea to pour into an empty glass then OH MY GOSH, I dropped it in the floor.  The lid came off and every last drop spilled before I could pick up the container again.  (I wasn't really awake, so I was moving really slow.)

Flailing around with icy cold tea on my already chilled feet, I found and  threw a bath towel on the mess, trying to mop up the tea.  Amazing how one quart of tea can flood an entire RV.   Oh and did I tell you it also splattered all over two throw rugs?  I settled on a glass of water, then went back to bed, after gingerly stepping over the sodden bath towel and the basket mess in the floor.

Puppy had stolen my feather pillow in my absence, so I took it back, because I can't sleep without it. We gave each other dirty looks and squared off  in separate corners of the bed.

Now I was almost wide awake. I turned on the TV to see what kind of drivel might be on to put me back to sleep. I set the timer to turn the TV off in 20 minutes. Lo and behold, American's Funniest Videos were on TV at 3:45am.  I love a good laugh, so I sat up in bed to watch the funny clips.

Suddenly the TV turned off. My 20 minutes were up and I was still awake. I found the remote to push the on button when OOPSY it flew out of my hands and vanished. I found the flashlight, was crawling around the floor amid all the junk looking for the remote. I never found it.  

Back in my dark bed I tried to meditate on something to the effect of "I am not a klutz, I am not a klutz, I am not a klutz."

This morning, it was rather frightening to wake up and see the mess. It's all starting to come back to me in little bits and pieces. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Wednesday, May 15, 2013

A Gorgeous Day

No pics today, I am having technical difficulties. Update...  I fixed the picture problem, more or less.

dear miss mermaid flowers at lake hartwell


Otherwise it's a beautiful gorgeous day today. I am super happy to be outdoors working again.  I have my laptop set up for writing out here, my puppy dog has dragged his toys out to the patio.

The temperature is perfect, the winds are steady and delightful.  The lake is full, not the sad sorry muddy mess of low levels I left last autumn when I departed.

What a great day to wake up alive!  I am the luckiest person in the whole wide world. 

One month down, four to go at this location. I am a volunteer workamper for five months.  This is my 3rd year at this location on Lake Hartwell at the Georgia and South Carolina border.

dear miss mermaid at lake hartwell


Life is GOOD.  That's my wheel estate parked at the top of the little hill. They put the workamper lot on a hill so we could look over the park, parking lot and lake.  There is a mailbox and a circular driveway that is paved.  You can't really see it in the picture, but I have a beautiful grassy lot to the side for puppy dog play.

Sadly part of my park is closed indefinitely thanks to some snafu with congress. Incredible.  I found this out after I showed up for workamping,  But they still need me, my duties haven't changed much, so here I am, happy as can be. 

I saw a snake the other day. YUCK.  I love nature  and wildlife but I just can't seem to like snakes one bit. I do know they are terribly shy.  I stomp around loudly when I exit the motorhome in the morning, just in case any are around, they know to get out of my way immediately.  In 3 years, this is the first one I have ever seen around here. YUCK.

I can only hope they find somewhere else to live.  I prefer NOT to see one at all. This one that I saw was big, but moving fast. I think my noise was scaring him to shuffle along at top speed. Bye bye snake.  *Shutters*

Harley is trying to settle back into life here. He loves thinking he owns the entire park. We call him the Bark Ranger.  The park rangers that occasionally stop by to check on me are very fond of him. Matter of fact, they are probably coming to see him and not me.

For some fool reason I started organizing my  upper bedroom cabinets. Now I have a huge mess piled up in the club chairs up front. It's just too pretty to be indoors so that project has been interrupted  Meanwhile I am utilizing the clothes line I strung up out back. I am catching up on laundry duties. The gentle winds are drying my things in record time. 

I have a tiny compact washing machine. It is awesome.  I worship that little machine because now that I am on year 3 with it, I realize that it has saved me a bundle of money.  Let's see 80 quarters weigh a pound, so I have saved about forty or fifty pounds in quarters by now. 



Many people wonder how I dry my clothes. I find this comical. I mean I grew up without a dryer. I helped my mother string the clothes out back on the clothes lines year round. If the weather was foul, she had a collapsible clothes drying rack we used indoors. 

The positive thing about line drying is it's good for the environment, going "green" as they say today. The clothes, sheets and towels all last much longer because they aren't getting all beat up in the tumble dryer.  Bet you didn't know this.  

For those that are used to clothes dryers, then it takes some time to get used to line dying, because clothes do not feel warm when they are dry. They feel cold, but they are really dry. 

Sometimes I hang my clothes on clothes hangers, then hang them all about an inch apart in my shower to dry.  I installed an overhead tension pole in the shower for hanging things up. Some campgrounds don't want campers to string up clothes lines, so in that case, I dry my stuff indoors.  The washing machine does small loads, so I hang up wet stuff until I run out of room, then I stop washing. Once they are dry, I can resume washing again.  Usually I don't get behind in laundry, but if I don't stay on top of it, well it will tend to accumulate. 

Well so much for the chit chat, I have to get up and do things.  Can't sit by the computer all day.  It's so beautiful out here today!  I just love being outdoors all day long. Yippie doodle do!

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Monday, May 13, 2013

RV Living and Learning (Part One)


This notebook is barely thick enough to hold all the manuals for the RV and it's accouterments. I am glad I found the zippered model.  I am such a klutz.  This keeps my papers from falling out. It pays to actually read the manuals too. I learned a ton about my RV, engine, appliances, generator and so on. 

This is how the bedroom looked when I went to see this RV which I ultimately bought. When we finalized a price through email and phone,  I picked it up from the owner (4 hours away) but the big red pillow was gone.  It had been hiding an ugly rotten rip in the bedspread that I had never noticed.

Note to self...  pay better attention next time.


Note to self...
This is NOT how to repair a leaky roof.  Matter of fact the tarp was so old, it had a few holes of it's own. The roof continued to leak inside despite the tarp. Yes that is snow on top and around it in South Carolina. It was so cold, depressing and dark inside. It was not a great moment in RV-ing. Matter of fact, I was so sick at the time, I was sure I had made a huge mistake. 

I was planning to repair the roof, then resell the RV. At the time, the doctor didn't expect me to hold on much longer. (How wrong he was!)

It was then and there I seriously daydreamed about being a snowbird, albeit a snowbird from South Carolina. But first I had to fix the roof... and get well enough to walk, drive and cook. 

As soon as it stopped snowing, the roof was repaired. My friend took the tarp because his roof was failing at his house. 

Amazingly, I spent two days driving from South Carolina to Florida. I left with the heater running full blast. By the time I found Florida, I had the heat off and the windows rolled down.  

I was officially a snowbird 4 months after buying the RV.  Somewhere on the way to Florida, I seriously fell in love with my wheel estate. 



This is how the previous owner showed me to put up the awning. A few weeks later, after reading the manual, I found out this was all wrong. You can also tell in the picture that the awning is ripped at the top.  I thought it would be easy to find someone to repair this. 

Ha ha ha!  I was dead wrong. 

Note to self...  read the manuals and learn a few things. 


Nobody told me about Eternbound roof tape until after I had paid a bloody fortune for an RV repair center to patch and paint the roof in rubber paint. However, Eternabond repaired the rip in the awning by attaching it to the roof.  This held up for over 2 years until a sudden storm tore it off while destroying the awning. 

Dang it. Time to repair the roof yet again. More caulk,  more rubber paint, more Eternabond tape

I've now learned to quit buying caulk.  Just use the Eternabond to seal up the seams and you are seriously DONE. Love this stuff. 


The old original awning kept proving to be bad luck. I didn't know you were supposed to put the awning at a draining angle when it was raining. I wasn't home when heavy rains set in. I came home staring at this HUGE puddle of water on top of my awning. Right before my very eyes, it collapsed, buckling the frame at both ends.  I was so lucky I was not underneath the ton of water that landed below. Yes a ton or more. 240 gallons of water equal a ton of weight (2,000 pounds.)

Note to self...  you are darn lucky to have angels watching over your fool head.



I traded tables with an RV couple. Their table was for 2, mine was for 4.  They switched out the table legs because theirs was pretty and mine was ugly.  When we hefted up the table to install it, I realized their table (the one above) was hollow where as the one I gave them was solid.

Note to self... they got a GREAT deal off me!  

Eventually I tossed out the hideous rusty table leg, replacing it with a nice simple tapered wooden one. 


I was climbing the walls because my galley didn't have enough storage room. Then I started converting the wall to storage. Wheeeee!




If you can't get the Ketchup bottle opened with a rubber gripper, then use the vice grips. 


When I was looking to buy the RV...
Oh how cute!  They converted the broom closet to an extra bathroom in the RV. Oh wait. That IS THE bathroom...


I live on a super efficient budget. I am not poor, I just lack funds... 

So when I found this cute makeup case in the dumpster, I converted it to my toolbox. Not sure which needs more work... my face or the RV. It has been the butt of many jokes. A few years later, a friend gave me their old toolbox, complete with more tools. YIPPIE!  I retired the makeup case.

Yepper, I'm a girl who loves tools. 


On a hot day that was in need of a cooling breeze, I clamped my clip-on fan outdoors to aim at my table and chair (not shown).  It kept me from dripping sweat all over the keyboard while I typed outdoors. 

This is my fridge about 20% full. The plastic baskets I found heavily discounted.  Of course I spent months shopping in bargain stores with a list of measurements.  Working like drawers, they help me literally stuff in the food when I stock up.  Also, they help with the dreaded cargo shifting that can happen when bouncing down the road. It's no fun to open the fridge after a long drive and have food land on the toes. Ouch!  

My red topped containers are all identical with screw on lids (Rubbermaid Twist and Seal Leakproof.) Shown are the 2 cup size. The 4 cup size uses the exact same lid, so I have a few of those too.  Even if they do fall out, they aren't likely to spill. Thank goodness becasue I am a real klutz and drop things often.

You won't catch me buying pricey bottled water.  I bought those 12 ounce blue refillable bottles shown on the top shelf.  I utilize a Brita water filter pitcher (not shown) to filter all my drinking  and cooking water. Having a few bottles chilled in the fridge is nice when I want to grab one to go on a walk or a bike ride. Harley dog knows exactly what's in the blue bottles too. If he is thirsty, he will stare at the bottle, begging for a drink  when we are walking or at a dog park. 

Maybe his head is good for something besides petting...

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Mother's Day

It's Mother's Day.  A wonderful day of celebration for the brave souls that brought us into this world.




I think every mother wants to ultimately see their child happy and successful.  

No matter what the odds, what tough crisis one may face, you've just got to get up every day and live it like it were your last day on this planet.  Love those around you and let them know it.  Thank everyone that has helped you in your journey.  Never stop being grateful.

Count your blessings. Do the math.

Smile.  Be free.  Do something nice for someone.  Help a stranger.  Do anonymous good deeds. Pass it on.  Play it forward.

Life is GOOD.

Where others see weeds, I see flowers.  

When opportunity knocks, sit up and pay attention. Many opportunities do not repeat themselves.  The right place at the right time.  Grab the ring and run with it.  

Rejoice that you have one more day to make a difference.

My mother is long gone from this earth, but I miss her everyday.  Sometimes I hear her talking to me.  

I listen too.

My mother suffered through a lot but she got up everyday and stayed busy taking care of her family and many others.  I don't think she had one selfish thought in her generous soul. She was a very giving person. 

Last year I wrote about my mother, Miss Marian.  



Miss Marian and The Crippled Children


http://dearmissmermaid.blogspot.com/2012/05/miss-marian-and-crippled-children.html


I reread it today.  It made me cry.  I miss my mother every day.  I just hope that some how, some way, she knows how much I appreciate and love her. 

Happy Mother's Day.





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