Saturday, June 29, 2013

It Was So Hot Today One Liners


It was so hot today I watched a chicken lay a fried egg.

It was so hot today the squirrel ran off with my potholder to move his nuts.

It was so hot today that when my dog went to chase the neighbor's cat for fun, they were both barely moving.

It was so hot today I was able to wash and dry my clothes in the same load.

It was so hot today that the book I am writing will be 50 Shades Of Red.

It was so hot the homeless man on the street corner had a new sign: "Will Work For Shade".

It was so hot today I saw a cornfield full of popcorn.

It was so hot today that my cookie dough baked itself on the way home from the store.

It was so hot today that when I heard bacon sizzling, I realized it was me.

It was so hot today that even the nudists went inside.

It was so hot today the cows are running a special on evaporated milk.

It was so hot today, I was branded by my seatbelt buckle.

It was so hot today, the devil closed hell due to unfair competition.

It was so hot today, the grass was whistling for my dog.

It was so hot today, my radiator boiled over and I haven't even driven all week.

It was so hot today that my bread was toasted when I got home from the store.


1 comment:

  1. Good Ones! I especially like the pic of the dogs and cats.

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