Wednesday, July 26, 2017

Bad Bad Doggy

I don't know what to do about my ill behaved doggy. 

He will chase anyone on a bicycle and not come back when called. 

It's scary for them and maddening for me. 

Bad boy!

I took him to a professional K9 trainer that guaranteed results in 5 days or your money refunded. 

At the end of 5 days I went to pick up my retrained pooch. 

The trainer handed me back my money and said "I'm sorry. Here's your money back. This dog is incorrigible.  I couldn't do a thing with him. He will still chase anyone on a bicycle."

"There might be only one very sad solution to this very bad behavior."

"What's that?" I asked nervously. 

The trainer took a long slow deep breath. 

He stared at the ground. 

I broke out in a sweat wondering what he would suggest. 

Finally he looked me in the eye. 

The trainer said "I am so sorry to tell you this."

I fought back the tears, scared for the future of my canine companion.

The trainer took another slow deep breath.

Finally he blurted it out. 

"You have to take away his bicycle!"







This active healthy dog is happily fueled by Newman's Own Adult Dog Formula made with organic grains and vegetables. Delivered to your door.

(As a bonus, this makes poop scooping a nice neat firm affair. Oh joy...)

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Sunday, July 23, 2017

Have Bicycle Will Think

I went to pick up my package delivered to the office which is a  good ways away from my campsite. It was a big heavy box.

I started to struggle out the door with it.

"You going to be OK with that?"

"Yes, I will put it on my bicycle and ride home."

"That will never fit on your bicycle!"

Obviously they didn't know WHO they were dealing with.  Tee hee hee .

I may not have a car, but I have a brain.

Not only did I tie it down on the bike with Nite Ize gear ties, but I rode home with a doggy in the front basket too.

All that is missing is a WIDE LOAD sign.


Rear pannier baskets by Nantucket and front doggy quick connect basket by M-Wave.

On the way home we passed two people chatting on side of road. I heard one say as I went by, "She uses that bicycle like a little truck."

Friday, July 21, 2017

Black Eye Friday

Argh!

Pirate on the loose. I have a black eye and my tooth fell out. The other pirate looks even worse. A scallywag cohort said I should put a warm tea bag on both and go back to bed.

Now that's a plan that appeals to me.

No hurricanes on the horizon so I should be safe to anchor a spell while I make tea and slap a bag on my injuries.

But first I have to deliver my loot to the Queen.


The box was heavy gold, way too big for my baskets. So I used two gear ties (one yellow, one black) to lash it down to the back rack with a loop around the seat.

I sent a picture to the Queen after scribbling across it "You're package is on it's way!"

If you don't know what gear ties are, then you aren't living right.


This is one of the handiest inventions I ever stumbled across. Actually an angel gave me some for Christmas and I've been hooked on them ever since.

Made by Nite ize, these gear ties are rubber coated durable wires that can be quickly molded (and remolded over and over) into any shape or twisted together, or twisted to make a quick tie without even bothering with a fancy knot.

They come in 3 inch on up to 64 inch. If you need one bigger than 64 inch, then just twist two together to make an even longer length. Short 3 inch ones are useful to neatly tie up bundles of wires or cables. If your wires and cables change, it's easy enough to untwist rearrange your cables then twist a gear tie back on it.

I have been using these for 1,001 uses around the ship, motorhome, bicycle, camping and now in my she-shed.

When I have difficult cargo that needs to be lashed down or tied up, I grab a gear tie. To keep my coffee pot from flying across the motorhome while driving, I use a gear tie to keep it safe. Ditto for the crock pot on the counter. A gear tie looped around the handle of the crock pot and through the galley rail that holds my spices, keeps the crock pot safe on the counter and not in the floor in a million pieces while driving.

You can also do sculpture with gear ties just for fun. I've cobbled so many projects together with gear ties, sometimes just to make a prototype first.  When I load my bicycle  on to the rear of the motorhome on my homemade bike rack, a gear tie is used to secure it. Now that I made a nifty ramp to make it easier to load and unload my bicycle, I drilled holes in it to lash it under the rack while driving. My little ramp is ready when I get there, just unlash, unload and ride off into the sunset.

Sometimes in a campground I put up a tall pole with a wifi antenna on top to pick up a signal. I use the gear ties to secure the pole to my rig or a tree or whatever there is around for me to lash it to. If the antenna is in the wrong place, it's just seconds to undo the gear ties, move the entire contraption and lash it to something again. I used to use gear ties to hold the antenna to the pole until I found a more permanent method.

Check out gear ties and get your life in order.  They come in assorted colors and sizes.

Oh and about that black eye and tooth. I don't know why the tooth fell out, I guess in sympathy for the eye.

My ear was blocked up, the one hit by lightening 20 years ago still gives me fits sometimes. I foolishly held my nose and blew real hard to try to clear my ear.

Bad career move!

About an hour later, the ear was still blocked up but my tooth fell out while eating rice. I swear I cooked the rice first. Went to bed a bit miffed about the cantankerous ear and upset about the tooth. I gave the ear one more good blow while holding my nose.

Woke up with a black saggy eye that feels just awful. I guess I blew a wee bit too hard.

Getting old ain't for sissies.

Life is goof. 



Wednesday, July 19, 2017

Solar Eclipse Coming Soon

The solar eclipse is coming Monday, August 21, 2017.

All of North America will be treated to an eclipse of the sun. Lucky folks  within the path of totality can see one of nature’s most awe-inspiring sights - a total solar eclipse. This path, where the moon will completely cover the sun and the sun's tenuous atmosphere - the corona - can be seen, will stretch from Lincoln Beach, Oregon to Charleston, South Carolina.

Observers outside this path will still see a partial solar eclipse where the moon covers part of the sun's disk.


Safety first.


Be sure to get your safety solar eclipse CE and ISO certified glasses.

Numerous style to choose from including clip-ons to add to your prescription eyeglasses.

This celestial event is a solar eclipse in which the moon passes between the sun and Earth and blocks all or part of the sun for up to about three hours, from beginning to end, as viewed from a given location.  For this eclipse, the longest period when the moon completely blocks the sun from any given location along the path will be about two minutes and 40 seconds.  The last time the contiguous U.S. saw a total eclipse was in 1979.

The solar eclipse will run from west to east.

You can see a partial eclipse, where the moon covers only a part of the sun, anywhere in North America. To see a total eclipse, where the moon fully covers the sun for a short few minutes, you must be in the path of totality, around 70 miles wide.

The first point of contact will be at Lincoln Beach, Oregon at 9:05 a.m. PDT. Totality begins there at 10:16 a.m. PDT.

Over the next hour and a half, it will cross through Oregon, Idaho, Wyoming, Montana, Nebraska, Iowa, Kansas, Missouri, Illinois, Kentucky, Tennessee, Georgia, and North and South Carolina.  The total eclipse will end near Charleston, South Carolina at 2:48 p.m. EDT.

From there the lunar shadow leaves the United States at 4:09 EDT.  Its longest duration will be near Carbondale, Illinois, where the sun will be completely covered for two minutes and 40 seconds.

One of my favorite Federal campgrounds is Buck Hall on the South Carolina coast which will be in the totality path. The government has decided to close the campground August 20-21-22 but the day use park will open at 8am on the 21st.

Their statement:
Attention: We are sorry, but Buck Hall Campground will be closed August 20-22, 2017 for public safety in response to the Total Solar Eclipse occurring on August 21st. The Day Use Area will open at 8:00 a.m. EST the morning of the 21st to accommodate visitors to view the eclipse. We expect an increase in traffic and visitation during this time and encourage you to plan accordingly. 


Monday, July 17, 2017

Sticker Shock

Sticker shock.

I moved to a place where the electricity has to be in my name and I have to pay it. They wouldn't let me put it in Harley's name. Doggone it.

Normally I am pretty darn frugal with electricity so imagine my surprise when the bill came in at $4.19 per day.

Yikes!

Well, it's the Harley dog's fault.

He needs a refrigerator for his wet food. He only eats half per day and I can't leave the other half out on the counter, so in the fridge it goes.

Then he loves to bicycle ride and he needs cold water in his thermos for that.

When it's hot he wants the air conditioning turned on for his comfort, especially when sleeping on hot humid nights. Otherwise the place stinks up of doggy smell.

For bathing, he insists on very warm water or else he shakes and shivers and makes a huge mess. So the electric hot water has to be on for him.

Ditto for washing his dishes every day. There is the dry food dish, the wet food dish, the water dish, the begging cup and the canisters to store his dry food need washing in hot sudsy water between refills.

Then there is the washing machine for doing his harness vests, his winter coat and his winter sweaters. Luckily he quit wearing Tshirts in the summer. Also have to use the washing machine to wash his bed, his pillow, his blankies and stuffed toys that have too much aromatic doggy drool on them.

Next I  have to wash his bathing towel, his beach towel or river towel or lake towel. He has a favorite rug where he plays and that needs a good washing now and then. Underneath his food bowls is a memory foam rug so he can remember where to find the food that keeps moving around depending om if I am driving or parking.

His  computer needs electricity so he can post silly videos and pics of himself.

When asked if he wants to watch a movie during a thunderstorm he will race for the closest seat to the set, so I have to look at his silly ear sticking up blocking half the screen. I have other things to do besides watching movies, but during a thunderstorm, he needs the distraction to keep from having a nervous breakdown.

His popcorn is made on the propane stove, but still there is the electric hot water to wash his popcorn bowl.

At night he wants lights so he can see to clean his privates and his toes before beddy bye time.

I am beginning to think the dog is responsible for 90% of the electric bill.






Friday, July 14, 2017

Wednesday, July 12, 2017

When Bad Produce Happens To Good People

Anonymous posted this comment:
Acetylene gas inside a rotten watermelon will cause an explosion when exposed to heat. Probably not putting in fridge helped the process along. 

***By the way, if posting a comment, just start or finish the comment with your name or nickname. It may still show up as anonymous for the name (some folks have trouble logging in and just use anonymous which I don't mind) but if you insert your name  embedded in the comment I can thank you!

I googled  Acetylene gas and learned all about "When bad produce happens to good people".

It makes me feel guilty for wondering if I had been the product of a practical joke gone very wrong. I previously had company that knew about my watermelon, but I can't imagine them trying to ruin it. I did briefly speculate they may have spiked it with alcohol and it went wrong, very wrong,  but since they know I don't drink spirits, I can't imagine them spiking it.

Also another friend was camping with me for a few weeks who was using my fridge. When we shopped they would buy all their favorite things which took up 95% of the tiny fridge leaving me about 5% for my favorite things, like the watermelon. I bit my lip, and said nothing. I could share whatever their favorites were, food is food, as long as it's not laced with sugars and chemicals, I can pretty much cook and eat anything. Their food choices were pretty healthy so basically it was a win win situation, just that I so wanted to chill the watermelon I crave. Oh well.

If and when my bicycle is repaired, I can pedal to the store for a new one. Maybe. My bicycle wars are another story. I don't feel like driving the motorhome to shop. It's too dang hot and too much work lately. I have my hands full trying to fix a mess of broken bits. Life is goof! It's July and I have only driven my motorhome twice since December 1st.

Life keeps dishing out the dawn of a new error. 

Ok back to that exploding watermelon... here's what I learned today!

As soon as a fresh plant is removed from its host plant or reaches maturity, it begins to very slowly break down. Heat accelerates this process.

As it breaks down, a colorless gas called acetylene forms inside the water melon. The gas is volatile and quite unstable while in gas form (which is why when it's used in scientific experiments it's usually used in liquid form.)

The gas will try its best to escape the water melon but as it slowly increases due to the rotting in the water melon, the pressure will continue to increase.

When the skin of the watermelon is no longer strong enough to hold the gas inside, it will explode, often spraying all nearby surfaces with rotten water melon. Sometimes a trip home from the shop in a warm car is the final catalyst required to create an explosion.

Well, that explains that! I picked up the watermelon and KERBOOM!



Monday, July 10, 2017

The Color of Watermelon

It's not Halloween but spooky things are happening around here. 

Trick or Treat!


watermelon


My little round seedless watermelon exploded. In my kitchen. Oh what an effing mess that made. I am still in shock. 

My new decor. Shades of watermelon. My new wardrobe. Watermelon hues.

I have no idea what lead up to this. I bought a little round watermelon with the intention of having it for lunch or breakfast once a day 4 days in a row. Just watermelon and nothing else. It's very filling. Oh so delicious. I love watermelon. (Almost as much as I love Vidalia onions!) Every summer I look forward to watermelon (and Vidalia's). Usually I have to buy the already sliced pieces because my motorhome fridge is so small, a regular full sized watermelon would never fit inside it. The problem with most motorhome fridges is the illusion. A long door but when opened the fridge is not deep at all. Matter of fact, a dozen eggs will only fit across the shelf not fore and aft. That is how my fridge lacks depth. 

Tiny home living. 

These newfangled personal sized watermelons appeared in the market. They were smaller than a bowling ball yet just as juicy and delicious. I thought I had died and gone to heaven! 

There wasn't room for my cute round watermelon in my tiny fridge just yet so I had it sitting in a Corelle bowl on the counter to keep it from rolling away to parts unknown.  But as other foods were consumed, I suddenly had room to chill my watermelon in the fridge. I gingerly picked it up briefly wondering why it had gone from rock hard to a slight give in the skin. Kerboom! There was bright red watermelon flying every where. On the stove top. Under the stove top. In the sink. Down the front of my shirt. In the floor. On the step stool. Running down the wall. Splattered on the window. A chunky mess landed on the upholstery for the dining booth. 

There was a scream. Was that me? The dog ran and hid under the table. I wanted to crawl under there with him. 

What happened? I stood there in shock and disbelief. I just wanted to rewind time, pretending this never ever happened. 

But what did just happen? 

I have no idea. It's one of life's mysteries. 

Trick or treat in July. 

The sad part? Not one spoonful of watermelon was salvageable for consuming. I never got a taste. 

What I got was hours of sticky messy oozy cleanup. 

Life is goof. 

Prime yourself for Prime Day Super Shopping Specials at Amazon, starting today!

Gigantic watermelon beach towel. Who'd a thunk it? I surely needed this to mop up my watermelon mess!


Thursday, July 06, 2017

That's A Lot of Bull

 Trains, road work, cars and a bull. This is one busy intersection in Sumter County, Florida. 



The devout cowboy lost his Bible while he was mending fences out on the range. Three weeks later, a bull walked up to him carrying the Bible in its mouth. 

The cowboy couldn't believe his eyes. He took the precious book out of the bull's mouth, raised his eyes heavenward and exclaimed, "It's a miracle!" 

"Not really," said the bull. "Your name is written inside the cover." 

And that's no bull...

I heard if you talk to a cow, it goes in one ear and out the udder.

I have to go now. I am going to help a farmer count his herd with my cow-culator. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
4 days to go!

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Wednesday, July 05, 2017

Happy 4th of July!



Thought I posted this yesterday.

Well, happy 5th of July!

I've been busy cuddling my pooch who needed some serious fur-baby time what with all the noise from fireworks. He is such an outgoing fearless dog until the fireworks start. Poor baby. Then he folds up his tail, looks very distressed and needs to be cuddled,held and comforted. That's when I call him my fur-baby because he wants to be held next to my heart. This seems to calm him back down, as he goes limp and relaxed as long as I hold him tightly with both arms while plastering him to my chest. If I let go the least little bit, he becomes frightened again.

Or maybe he just wanted to watch a happy movie.

I haven't had time to watch a movie in awhile and doggy loves movies.

With both hands and arms busy holding him,with sweet murmurs "It's OK baby, it's OK..." there isn't much else I can get done like typing, or cooking, or cleaning.

Kerbooms and bangs, a scared doggy and a happy movie.

Life is goof.

~~~~~~~~~~~~
5 days to go!

The third annual Prime Day will be Tuesday, July 11, 2017 with hundreds of thousands of deals exclusively for Prime members around the world. New this year, members can enjoy 30 hours of shopping starting early at 6pm PT / 9pm ET on Monday, July 10, 2017 – with new deals as often as every five minutes.

Visit the official Prime Day page 

Try Amazon Prime 30-Day Free Trial

Sunday, July 02, 2017

New Noisy Neighbors

It's the Moody Blues playing at raucous volume!

It's better to seen and not herd.

Whinnying, mooing, nickering, honking, heehawing, bleating, baying, bellowing, neighing, bawling, caterwauling, baaing, snorting and hooting.

harley dog

Turn the udder cheek and moo-ve on!

Then the welcome wagon rep showed up.

bull jokes, bullshit

"Howdy Neighbor!" he said "I may look dumb, but I been to cowlege where I studied Moosic, Phycowlogy and Cowculus. Now I'm a baker by trade. I make cow pies daily."


I have to go now. See that coffee colored cow?
She's about to give birth and be de-calf-enated. 
I have to calm her down.
If she jumps over the barbed wire fence, it will be udder destruction!

No bullshit.

A man staggers into the emergency room with a concussion, multiple bruises, and a golf club wrapped around his neck.  The doctor asked him "What happened to you?"

 "Well, it was like this" said the man.  "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, when at a difficult hole, we both sliced our balls into a pasture of cows.  We went to look for them. My wife has pink monogrammed golf balls and mine are white with my initials. While I was rooting around I noticed that one of the cows had something round and pink sticking out it's rear end.  I walked over lifting  up the tail, and sure enough, there was a pink golf ball  stuck smack dab in the middle of the cow's butt.  That's when I made my near fatal mistake."

"That cow attacked you?" asked the doctor.

"Um... no" replied the man.

"While lifting up the cow's tail, I pointed, and yelled to my wife on the other side of the pasture,  Honey!  This looks like yours!"

And that's no bull...

I woke up in a great mooo-d. 

Time to cow-nt my udder blessings.

Life at this Florida RV park in a rural setting is special indeed.

I guess I've milked this subject for all it's worth. I hope you found this a-moo-sing.

Y'all come back now! Ya hear?

Saturday, July 01, 2017

Harley Dog Commando Crawl

Harley gets a lot of attention from gentle readers who are kind enough to post a comment. Thank you! Here are some recent comments, also below is a short video of Harley I made yesterday.

Harley dog doing okay? You haven't mentioned him lately. on A Beautiful Life
Anonymous
on 6/24/17

What happened to Harley dog? on Hard Work
Anonymous
on 6/6/17

So glad Harley dog is going to be okay! No more sticks! on Emergency
Anonymous
on 6/7/17

Oh, my, I'm so glad this true story has a happy ending ! Our animals can stress us out completely. Don't laugh, but I pray for ours, immediately. God obviously loves animals too. 😊 on Emergency
Linda A.
on 6/8/17

Last time Harley Dawg went to the vet for the emergency in Okeechobee, it was embarrassing that he was dirty and stinky in an old ratty vest harness. Well the little fellow is a busy boy and he does wear his stuff out quickly. Just because he wore it out, doesn't mean I have it in the budget to replace it. Sheesh I look at old pictures and realize how many vests he has wore out beyond repair over the years.  He is not destructive, but he is one super busy dog. It's why he wears a vest, he tangles up in a harness and a collar isn't safe for active little dogs due to trachea trauma. So I try to find him little vests to wear.

Mostly I let him be a dog. If he wants to roll around in the dirt, I let him. He shakes and vibrates so much, all the dirt has fallen off before he goes back inside but this can be rough on his vest. Mostly he prefers pavement over dirt, but sometimes he can't resist the urge to roll around and get dirty. It's a dog's life. He has lived so much of it in a teeny motorhome, he deserves some dog time now and then to just be a mutt.

I realized Harley's shots are due. Here I am in a strange town again, this time Sumter County, Florida which is fairly rural with only quaint towns that if you blink while driving through them, you might miss them altogether. My friend offered to take me in his camper van to the vet clinic. I called ahead, it's a walk-in place, was told to come before 2:30pm. Well, we got there at about 1:00pm and the receptionist was so embarrassed. The vet had been twiddling his thumbs daydreaming about starting his vacation so they decided he would leave early and start his vacation since it's July 4th week.

What a shame! That morning I had bathed Harley, put on a clean harness vest (rough at the edges but at least it was clean!) and now Harley was wildly excited as he associates bathing with something special coming up like to chance to visit humans or dogs or both. He was already enjoying his ride in the van. He has a little water dish, food and treats in the van, so he thinks it's a big event.

Harley was spared his shots.

But while riding around the countryside looking for a junk yard my friend wanted to visit to find some RV parts, we stumbled into another vet office. Well, what the heck. Walk in and ask. Maybe they would work in a doggy for shots.

What luck! They did see us right away, gave Harley a brief exam which he did not like one bit. I warned them to consider a muzzle to make it go fast and smooth. Poor baby. I said soothing things to him while they muzzled him. He glared at us, mumbling growls. What? You gave me a  bath and a clean vest so you could do THIS to me?

When the vet (named Dr Toto!) was done, the assistant was in a hurry to remove the muzzle. I said "Wait! Let me get the leash on first!" I could see Harley was plenty agitated from his rectal temperature exam and the added insult of a nasty shot on such a frail little body. This growling is something new, he used to be kind to vets, but about two years ago, we went to an unkind vet, and well, Harley has had to be muzzled since then. Well, she didn't wait. She removed the muzzle and Harley spun around, nipped her on forearm then flew off the cold stainless steel exam table to run hide in the corner under the chairs where he growled and grumbled refusing to come out so I could leash him up.

I apologized for the nip, it didn't break the skin, but she was mad. I guess as a vet tech, it was her first time having a dog nip her. If she had let me put the leash on first, then I could have gently held him while she removed the muzzle. Also he wouldn't be cowering under the furniture now, growling up a storm with these huge angry eyes. I can't risk getting bit either or any kind of skin break. My immune system is seriously compromised and that's just how life is for me. But I can't give up pet ownership either, I love my little fur baby.

The vet tech left and upon seeing the door open, Harley got up to race for freedom, but I snagged him, popped on the leash, then scooped him up for some loving.

Here is the promised video of Harley doing his hilarious commando crawl. He had just been bathed and put out in the sunshine to dry. Since he now has a portable dog pen, he wasn't tethered or vested.


Thank you for stopping by and thank you to the angels on heaven and earth who look out after us.

Bless you and happy July 4th week!