Monday, September 23, 2019

Bongo Below

Jerry, Karen, Lorenzo...

Sounds like the cast of a triangle in a soap opera. 

Speaking of soap operas... I recently finished up one named OUTRAGEOUS FORTUNE.

My neighbor watched most of the six seasons with me. On days I was feeling rough and stuck home resting, I would turn it on. 

It's filmed in New Zealand so we learned new kiwi lingo. Like what it means to root somebody or saying "I'd be keen to do that".

If you're really keen, then you're heaps keen. 

Grab your togs, let's go swimming. I'd be heaps keen to get wet.

If you're cold, forget the sweater, what you need is a jumper. 

To be knackerd is to need a nap. 

Spend more time at your bach and if you're lucky, yours is on or near the coast. A bach is a second home, a holiday place you own or rent annually.

You got that mate? Aye?

When your holiday money runs out you have bugger all. 

Kiwis would say where I live now is out in the wops. Which is to say the middle of nowhere. 

If you've run out of room for more luggage in your car then it's chocka. If ya crash your car or it breaks down, then it's munted. If you were drunk when it happened then you were munted too. 

If the repairs is pretty easy, then it's a piece of piss. But if you're having a party it's a piss-up. 

If you want someone to mind their own business then you yell piss off. But if you're being unreasonable, then you're taking the piss.

If you forgot your togs then you say "Aw, stink one".

I will tell you more in the nek minute. 

You can tell I am having a mare day when I watch TV (mare is a difficult time).

Packing a sad, is having a tantrum!

Chuck on our gumboots and let's walk through the cow farm.

If it's choice then it's awesome or top shelf. 

And if you think I'm a dag, then you think I'm funny!

Southerners say bullshit but kiwis say spinning a yarn. 

Southerners keep their beer in a cooler but Kiwi's keep theirs in a chilly bin. 

Bowling round, means you're coming to visit. 

Heaps means lots and Kiwis love this word heaps and heaps. 

If you thought that funny, then it was a crack up.

Maori words are thrown in with the Kiwi slang such as pakaru (I like pakaru heaps) but pakaru describes heaps of my belongings in that pakaru means broken. 

If he spat his dummy, then he was angry in a childish way. That dummy is what we call a baby pacifier. 

So if you want to learn heaps more then watch Outrageous Fortune for free with Amazon Prime. 

I would say this is an adult soap opera. Not really suitable for children at all or else you will be explaining heaps. Each episode blends into the next one. Some leave you with shocking cliff hangers.  

It's well written, the characters are distinctly unique. It has some real dark comedy thrown in that kind of sneaks up on you. 

Trivia... one actor plays two very different twins. 

Ironically Outrageous Fortune takes liberty borrowing liberally from Shakespeare. Even the title was snatched from the famous "To be or not to be" speech which states: "To be, or not to be, that is the question: Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or to take arms against a sea of troubles.

The youngest child Loretta is also used in photographs of her deceased grandmother. The air-head older sister sometimes refers to things vanishing just like the Bahamas Triangle which of course there is none, it's called the Bermuda triangle but it's funny they make this subtle air head reference more than once. 

When they referred to one character's Mazda Bongo van, I thought it was a reference to his predilection to smoking weed, sometimes out of a bong.

But the joke was on me, they really do make a Mazda Bongo Van.

Friday, September 20, 2019


Quality of life.

I've been doing hoodoo and voodoo to stay away from the doctors and drugs.

Most don't want me anyhow since my insurance was cancelled.

I juggle all sorts of alternative treatments that can be done at home or nearby.

It's well worth the effort!

I'm alive and I feel alive.

There are times I feel sorry for others. I know man folks that are over-scheduled with medical appointments.

I get a slew of robot calls from medical facilities imploring me to have endless tests that I don't care to do. So I don't.

Sadly I have been in the hospital twice this year but hopefully I've seen their exit signs for the final time!

Home is where the heart is.

The less time I spend in or around medical facilities and drugs stores, the happier I am. 

Life is goof. 

See more from Jane Goodall at Amazon.

Tuesday, September 17, 2019

Mermaid Car

After 10+ years of no car, I am looking around at something suitable for a mermaid to drive.

This looks like a nice option.

Amazon has competitive prices on numerous car parts and accessories such as rain guards for your windows. This allows you to park with the windows cracked to cool off the car in the summer without risk of rain damage. 

Probably half the people in Florida add these to their cars and the other half wish they had them. 

Anytime you use any of my Amazon links, it helps the dog and I buy groceries and other supplies. We thank you from our head to our tails!

Friday, September 13, 2019

Date Night at the ER

Emergency Room. 

Twice I've been in the hospital this year. Yuck!

This time it was emergency surgery. More yuck yuck yuck. 

About a week earlier I woke up with a lump on the back of my head. Each day it slowly grew and became more painful until I was nearly insane with pain. 

By Friday afternoon my close friend who was going to take me out for dinner, instead called my doctor who agreed to see me in about an hour. We drove over so he could take a look-see. 

To complicate matters, I have a rare disease for which there is no cure. It sometimes wreaks havoc with my life. There are occasions when for inexplicable reasons it produces painful cysts, boils, lumps or tumors.It also causes me to grow scar tissue in odd places which can be very problematic. Sometimes the same lump comes back repeatedly.I've had tumors where there were previously cysts and cysts where there were tumors. It's maddening!

My doctor had never dealt with this before. He has only seen me once since I came out of the hospital in January. At that time I was having a rough time finding a doctor to see me at all! I just wanted a medication renewed so I finally settled on him basically because the other practices were too busy to take me on. He's very young. 

He examined my head then brought in another doctor. They decided I needed surgery immediately at the hospital. They scribbled out an address and 40 miles later I arrived at Bayfront Hospital which is near Weeki Wachee, home of the mermaids. 

Amazingly when I told the ER I was there because my doctor thought I needed emergency surgery, they took me in right away. A few hours later, I was on my way home again with a hole in my head.

Life is goof.  

Thursday, September 05, 2019

Harley dog and I survived hurricane Dorian with a close friend taking shelter with us too. 

I have big lump on back of my head.  No idea what happened. Woke up a few days ago with a big painful lump.

It hurts something awful. I am taking old pain pills or what I call pucking fain pills. I am not a fan of pain pills but I do not do well with pain at all. I can be real nasty when I am in pain and that is enormously embarrassing. I am a laid back happy go lucky child of the planet when I am pain free.

Did a rainbow hit me in the head?

No idea. 

I am just relieved that the big bad hurricane chose to leave my little slice of heaven intact.  

The view from m dining table.

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Wednesday, September 04, 2019

X Marks the Spot

Dear Miss Mermaid last seen at this red X.

As of 11am Wednesday September 4th, we have a very dark sky but no rains.


Wind and rains are here at 4am in central Florida.

I hope I have protected most of my outdoor furniture and potted plants. There just isn't room to bring anything else inside.

Shop Amazon with my links please. The little commissions add up and help me tremendously. 

Thank you kindly!

Monday, September 02, 2019

Rowdy Ronda Attacks Dog

Ronda... my vacuum cleaner robot was zipping around while Harley was sitting on the kitchen stool. It has felt pads on it so it doesn't scratch the parquet floor. Ronda bumped the stool and it slid about an inch with Harley on top of it. He looked down at Ronda and gave her a warning bark.

She responded by zipping around the stool and bumping it again moving it another inch in a different direction. Harley looked down barking at her again. She reversed then took aim at him a third time.

Now he was MAD. He hopped off his stool and tried to bite her! Not once but twice!

However she is too big for his little mouth.

I moved his stool up to the dining area which is a step up, so Ronda couldn't reach him anymore.

It's tough being a little doggy trying to lord over all from his lofty bar stool. 


For 18 months I have used a Roomba from iRobot. I named her Ronda. I worship her. For 18 months she has faithfully vacuumed my RV every single day except for the 12 days I was in the hospital on life support.  While I was in the hospital a friend moved into my RV to get it ready for me coming home.

My friends thought it funny that when they finally brought me home from the hospital and helped me inside I asked "Has anyone run Ronda today?"

Ronda is an adaptive aid. If you know anyone struggling to remain independent, get them a Ronda.  

Life is goof. 

Strong Freaking Dorian Hurricane


Hurricane Dorian.

  • Since 1950, only 3 Atlantic hurricanes have had max winds stronger than Hurricane Dorian's current max winds of 180 mph: Allen (1980): Max winds of 190 mph Gilbert (1988): Max winds of 185 mph Wilma (2005): Max winds of 185 mph
  • "Only one hurricane has made continental US landfall with winds this strong: The Labor Day Hurricane of 1935 (185 mph max winds)."
  • "Only two hurricanes have made continental US landfall with a lower pressure than Hurricane Dorian's current pressure of 913 hPa. Labor Day Hurricane of 1935 (892 hPa) and Camille of 1969 (900 hPa)."
  • "Dorian now has the strongest winds (180 mph) for a hurricane this far north (26.5°N) in the Atlantic east of Florida on record."
  • "The strongest hurricane landfalls in the Atlantic basin not in the continental US since 1985 are 180 mph landfalls by Hurricane Irma in 2017 on Barbuda, St. Martin and the British Virgin Islands. Unfortunately, it looks like Hurricane Dorian may join that infamous list shortly."

Sunday, September 01, 2019

Dorian Dart Board

Here's one for the dart board. 

Hurricane Prep

I am alive and getting read for the hurricane.

Sorry I have not posted in awhile. I was sick and just overwhelmed trying to take care of me, the dog and this old RV.

I'm doing much better now, just weak and tired but very happy to be alive.

August has come and gone. I've survived man funerals of loved ones in August past. This year a loved one passed on during August but I wasn't able to make the service in New York so I just had to send my prayers.

On a funny  note. below is a picture of a 5 year old on her first day of school. The left side is how she looked moments before being dropped off at school in her adorable uniform.

On the right is  how she looked 5 hours later when her mom picked her up at school.

We've all had days like that.