"Santa Claus You are Much too Fat" (Sung to the tune of Jingle Bells)

"Santa Claus You are Much too Fat" (Sung to the tune of Jingle Bells)

I heard a reindeer hoof,

then Santa dressed in red came crashing thru' the roof,

and landed in my bed.

I thought it was a dream,

but quickly did I wake,

as soon as I heard Santa yell "I want a piece of cake"

Ohhhh, Santa Claus Santa Claus

You are much too fat

I was sleeping peacefully but now my bed is flat.

Ohhhh Santa Claus Santa Claus

How much do you weigh?

I'm glad I'm not a reindeer

That has to pull your sleigh.

He got up off the floor and said "How do you do?"

I said "my back is sore, my head is black and blue"

"So sorry" he replied, and then he asked my name.

He offered me a ride, I said "No thank you just the same."

Ohhhh, Santa Claus Santa Claus

You are much too fat

I was sleeping peacefully but now my bed is flat.

Ohhhh Santa Claus Santa Claus

How much do you weigh?

I'm glad I'm not a reindeer

That has to pull your sleigh.

I heard a "ho ho ho",

the sleigh was in the sky but it was moving slow and wasn't very high

t wobbled in the air,

I hoped it wouldn't fall;

Said Santa chewing cookies "Merry Christmas, one and all!"

Ohhhh, Santa Claus Santa Claus

You are much too fat

I was sleeping peacefully but now my bed is flat.

Ohhhh Santa Claus Santa Claus

How much do you weigh?

I'm glad I'm not a reindeer

That has to pull your sleigh.