2009 08 07 721pm MIRACLES

The air conditioning was repaired today AND a dear sweet angel brought me a stand fan, so now I am super cool!

Yeah, Baby!

Here's a recap of WHAT HAPPENED to the MERMAID...

On the 21st of July, I was out and about all day trying to run errands and that evening with a friend from half way around the world. I didn't feel too well, but thought I was being lazy. Actually, as I look back at my logs and blogs, notes, diaries, I haven't felt well in quite a while, but thought I was suffering from being LAZY...

I even took a short vacation, thinking it would jump start me again, and was sick much of my vaction and bewilderingly scared at times.

I had no idea I was really SICK and getting sicker, and just a time bomb ready to explode!

On the 22nd of July I woke up seriously ill and thought my dinner from the night before may not have been cooked right. I will spare you much of the gore and give you the SHORT CUT!

Then my breathing became difficult and a sneeze went uncompleted and at some point I realized I couldn't speak or breathe or move!

IT WAS TERRIFYING!!!

I thought, that's IT, you just wake up DEAD one day and your life is over.

911 kept hanging up on me, because I couldn't speak, I began punching my neighbors' phone number and he found me, called the wham-bulance and I arrived at the Emergency Room more dead than alive.

Like a fish out of water, I flipped and flopped in the final death throws...

I was sure my life was OVER. It seemed all my dead friends and relatives were gathered around me, but they didn't seem dead at all, they seemed VERY MUCH ALIVE!

More on THAT later...

The doctor on duty hooked me up to a ton of equipment and phone calls were made and more doctors showed up and such began my LONG odyssey.

Apparently I had a massive infection in my lungs that had literally paralyzed me. I've had numerous complications since, but I do feel confident I am now getting great care.

Now the medical community is still MILES behind when it comes to any sort of holistic or alternative therapies. Because my life has sat so close on the edge I have a long list of POSITIVE things I do and a long list of negative things I REFUSE to do.

For instance, I do have Internet access but I REFUSE to watch the news (Very depressing, bad for my recuperation) and so on. I am literally avoidng a long list of negative things.

I pray for miracles and angels. And when I stumble across the devil, I try to avoid them at all costs (but the devil IS HERE and she's looking for souls to steal!!!)

Many ministers and lay persons have shown up to pray over me and I welcome ALL. (apparently they know about the devil here too!)

I meditate and chant. Years ago, I spent a bloody fortune with a real hypnotist and I've recalled all that I learned and spent HOURS upon HOURS focused on a dot on the ceiling, willing my body to GET WELL through self-hypnosis. (Another short cut explanation).

I try to THANK everybody and be a gracious patient, in spite of being in a TON of pain much of the time and unable to stomach much of the drugz without yogert intervention and so on etc. I know I've been a cranky awful patient at times, and I FAILED to understand the seriousness of being brought back to LIFE.

I focus on LAUGHTER and COMEDY and try to find a way to turn negative into positive and so on.

My mind wanders EVERYWHERE! And now I get up and out of bed and wander all over the hospital and up and down stair ways and try to build up my strength.

I smile and get dressed, I am not wearing bed clothes, just old clothes and the hospital has been keeping my meager wardrode washed for me.

This hospital is lacking in many many ways, but the people working here for the most part are doing the BEST they can under the very trying circumstances.

I have no idea who is reading this blog, so there are many things I can not mention here for reaons of my privacay or the privacy of others.

I have NO IDEA when I will go home and I MISS MY KITTIES something awful. BOO hoo hoo!!!

I believe I will LIVE and actually get out of here ALIVE one day. People stop by now and then and say I look GREAT and I never know if they are being polite or if my positive energy is shining through. It's NOT EASY to be so upbeat and positive 24/7 but if I slip away, I could slide right under and that would be, well, the end of my life.

These wonderful people worked very hard and SAVED MY LIFE and the least I could do is try to make it out of here vertically, not horizontally.

I AM ONE LUCKY LADY!!!

I imagine, when I get out of here, my future will be vastly different.

But, a little change or a lot of change, it's all GOOD if I get out alive! (AND if the devil doesn't steal my soul!)

The numerous emails, visitors, get well cards and various bulltin board postings, have been eventually finding their way to me, and I am SHOCKED. I feel the rally, I feel the energy, I think all this POSTIVE stuff is just what it's gonna take to get me out of here ALIVE!

THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR TIRELESS SUPPORT AND KIND WORDS AND WISHES. I HAD NO IDEA, JUST NO IDEA.... SO MANY WONDERFUL FOLKS EXISTED ON OUR FINE PLANET!

Calling all angels...